Diana, I am most curious about the perspective you have on your life as opposed to how you saw it when you were here. Could you talk to me about that?
It is most different from here, obviously because one is not in the middle of the storm, as I always was, or seemed to be. In my own life, I always felt I was in there middle of a storm and there was no room for a clear perspective, you see. So, while I wanted happiness, I seemed always to meet with sadness, confusion, loneliness, anger. I felt alone in the world, although I had my sons, whom I adored, and I would do it all over again, just to have them back. But from here I can see things more clearly, differently. I see that the storms I put myself in could have been avoided in some ways. I knew many times what I was going into, but my youth and naïveté didn’t allow me to stand up for myself. I had the naïveté of youth that told me things would always be all right and just to hold on. That my prince – quite literally – would come back to me if I was just good enough, kind enough, loving enough, and took enough of what he said and did and pretended not to be bothered by it. But that’s not who I am or was, you see. So, I could not pretend anything, and the more I tried to, the more it hurt and the more it hurt the more it showed, but being royal, we aren’t meant to let anything show, so I was an anomaly for them, not to mention quite the problem for them too. But what I faced served a purpose too, and I actually feel honored to have been put in those positions because it was an important position, and God must have known I could handle it, or was the right person for the job, or I would not have had the life I had, which turned out to be much more of a blessing than I ever thought it was or gave it credit for being. I see it differently now.
How do you see it now?
I see it as an opportunity to open up a long-reigning monarchy that needed changes, and the changes have happened, throughout my life and death. My passing needed to be dramatic and sad for people, so that they would demand change, you see. Had I been able to live out my life – which I actually did, but I mean to live to old age – there would not have been the public outrage, the public demand for the monarchy to do things differently and not be so archaic and inconsequential. A public can put up with a monarchy if they are not stepping on their toes and presenting themselves in a way that hurts the way of life of its people. The people adored me, something that was quite shocking to me, and therefore demanded change. The monarchy really serve no purpose anymore – some would say neither do Parliament, but that is another story – and for all their money and stature, they are still at the will of the people. And do not want to lose face, so to speak, in front of them. They need to lead the public movement, not follow far behind it.
It has done much good. Their father is so good with my boys, and they have a wonderful relationship, and can still think fondly of me. Had I lived, I’m not sure what relationship they would have had with him, and what they have now is very important. They got what they needed from me – a foundation in important works and a knowledge that they had to look outside of themselves to what is happening in the world and what is important in the world. They know what the royal life is like and they function well within it, but the needs of the world need to supersede their needs sometimes, as their needs are always met. I am proud of William, the way he reaches out and is so good with people, and so natural in otherwise difficult surroundings. They both will do well. And my Harry will find his way, too. He is very smart and doesn’t need the approval of others the way I sometimes felt I did. That stood in my way. Nothing will stand in his. My boys are the future of England, and in some ways, the world, and I thank God for that. They will lead well. They will tend to what is important and leave behind what is superficial. I couldn’t be happier that things went the way they did, and I can’t say that I ever thought I would say that, while I was alive. This is the gift of a new perspective.
Diana Spencer, Princess of Wales, died in a car accident in Paris on August 31st, 1997, at the age of 36. Her passing, after a tumultous life, was seen as tragic and un-timely, but her short time on Earth as having had much meaning and having had a lasting impact on a great many people. Below, she explains the difference in her view of her life now.
